Did you know lots of women who fall in love with a man who
is inflicted with some kind of narcissistic personality disorder are often
described as fixers. We are the women who want to help, who want to make it all
better and who want heal someone else.
It's actually a dangerous trait despite the fact it comes
from a good place. It is driven by love,
real love and true commitment to working thorugh things. That is the irony of it all. I was told repeatedly, over and over that I
failed to work hard enough to make a success of our relationship. The ultimate projection as I was doing
exactly that. I was working incredibly
hard to ‘fix’ it and make it all ok. The
thing is, fixing a man with a personality disorder is impossible.
To accept I was fighting a losing battle is a hard pill to
swallow. The admission is painful and I
fight to pull myself away from the word failure. It is a big word and I ask myself, did I
really fail? The right question is
probably, could I have succeeded? My
mind gives me a resounding ‘no’ when I ask the question.
Whatever I did, however much I gave and with all the
commitment in the world. I would never
have succeeded in having a rewarding relationship.
I must keep reminding myself….
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